Not that I have ever really doubted the total depravity of the human soul or that we are born with the fatal flaw of original sin; however I must admit that when Jake was born I had a hard time coming to grips with it. I can remember so vividly holding him for the first time in the hospital and looking down at him thinking “what a perfect baby.” And in my heart, I knew he was a perfect gift from God, but I think I may have ventured into believing for a moment that he actually was perfect. The tiny fingers and toes, the desire to be held and loved… I could go on and on.
Well 8 months later I got my first peek at the sin nature that tells all of us – “I want to be the boss and do what I want to do.” Jake is mobile now – crawling and scooting around and the other day he made his way to a plant. Now this was a night I had dad duty since Brooke was at work and I’m usually working extra hard to make sure I don’t mess anything up. Well I look in at him from the kitchen and he has a leaf from the plant in his hand and I’m quite sure it has already made it into his mouth. I took it away from him and then watched him for a bit.
He rolled back over and turned and went for another one. I wasn’t really expecting that so I said “No” in a fairly stern voice. His head snapped around to look at me with a look I had never seen before. Kinda like, “What did you just say to me?” And come to think of it, I don’t know if he had ever heard “No” from me before.
Then seconds later, he turns right back to the plant and out goes the hand. Again I said, “No” this time pushing his hand down to the ground. He quickly looked at me then the face of sadness came and he dropped his head to the ground and started crying. Rinse and repeat.
I couldn’t take it anymore so I picked him up and redirected his attention. Then the moment of truth hit me… I don’t have a perfect kid. I have a kid who wants to do what he wants, despite the care and will of his father. Sound familiar? Yea, I thought so too. Man, how we need a Savior!